Sloppy the Psychotic
Director: Mike O’Mahony
Writers: Erich Ficke, Mike O’Mahony
Stars: Grace Aguilar, Kayla Beaver, Lewis Beaver
What they say: After a cruel twist of fate, Mike finds himself without his beloved job as a childrens clown and starts slipping deeper into the abyss, unleashing a psychopath so insane that even John Wayne Gacy would be shocked. Bout after bout of bad luck finally sends him completely over the edge!
What I say: To quote a true clown “Sweet Baby Jesus!” As any regular reader of this site has surely noticed, I have watched a lot of crap lately. Add in Sloppy the Psychotic and I practically have my very own compost pile. I’m sure some mongoloids will latch onto this shit, thinking its “cool” and “exxxtreme”. Let me be the first to tell you, they are wrong. VERY wrong.
The “story” is about Mike, a loser dumbass, who works as a birthday clown. The rest of his life isn’t much either. So when Mike, as Sloppy, freaks out a kid at a party he is fired. Having lost his only joy in life, he hits the bottle and becomes Sloppy the Psychotic. Yeah. SO anyways Sloppy goes on a bender and kills everyone that ever ridiculed him as well as the woman that got him fired. The film tries really hard to be “exxxtreme” and in better hands it might have come off as more than a sick wank job. I mean it’s really hard to take shit like this seriously when there are other independent filmmakers out there making stuff like Inside and A Serbian Film.
So to sum up; the acting is more wooden than a forest, the story is a mess, direction is imaginary, and despite all the child killing and bum drowning this thing is a real drag to watch although the effects and editing are ok. The film does attempt a “twist” at the end but it just comes off as uninspired and lazy.
9 Days: Whipped Chained and Tortured By a Psychopath
Director: Samuel M. Johnson
Writer: Samuel M. Johnson
Stars: Simone Frajnd, David Alan Graf, Elizabeth Lawrence
What they say: To escape her abusive foster home, headstrong 18-year-old Danielle Hitches a Ride with an affable Psychopath who has an axe to grind against women based on his warped religious beliefs. What Virgil doesn t know is that Danielle may be more than up to the challenge of his psychotic head games.
What I say: *Sigh* Being delivered in the same package as Sloppy the Psychotic certainly did not do this film any favors. After watching the pile of crap I was pretty leery of continuing on with any other contents. Guilt by association ya know. So anyway we have Danielle who lives with a foster parent that likes to, shall we say, take a dip in the pool. She runs away and hitches a ride with Virgil. Now before we go any further if this chick was getting molested would she really trust a stranger enough to get into his car? I think not.
Where was I? Oh yeah, once Virgil gets Danielle to the crib, he knocks her out and chains her up in the basement. When she wakes she finds that Virgil is a religious nut and he believes that he will cleanse the sin through torture. Nice! There is very little torture unless you count Virgil’s constant lectures (And I do…yikes!), that fool talks so much it felt like I was chained up for 9 Days. This movie was tired before it even started. There have been so many “Let’s chain that bitch up in the basement” movies that they all just blend together into a blur. Any concept can be elevated by its talent but alas, no such luck here. Much like Sloppy the Psychotic it’s amateur hour all around. Man I am just really tired of talking about this shit. I’m off to try another movie.
A Darker Image was provided pre-release screeners by Chemical Burn. I wonder if they named their company after the sensation you get from watching their films? MY EYES! MY EYES! Please don’t send anymore…please